Alice in Wonderland, Part 1

Alice in Wonderland, Part 1
CBS
December 9, 1985
TV-Movie, Children's, Fantasy, Musical
VHS
D+


OK, let's just start with the mind-blowing cast:

• Sheila Allen (producer Irwin Allen's wife) as Alice's Mother
• Scott Baio as Pat the Pig
• Red Buttons as the White Rabbit
• Sid Caesar as the Gryphon
• Imogene Coca as the Cook
• Sammy Davis, Jr. as the Caterpillar (he played the Cheshire Cat in the 1966 TV version, which I haven't seen)
• Sherman Hemsley as the Mouse
• Arte Johnson as the Dormouse
• Roddy McDowall as the March Hare
• Jayne Meadows as the Queen of Hearts
• Robert Morley as the King of Hearts
• Anthony Newley as the Mad Hatter
• Donald O'Connor as the Lory Bird
• Martha Raye as the Duchess
• Telly Savalas as the Cheshire Cat
• Ringo Starr as the Mock Turtle
• Shelley Winters as the Dodo Bird

On the one hand, it's cool to see such an eclectic array, but on the other, I spent most of the time feeling sorry for them, especially (if I had to pick just one) Shelley Winters; here's an acclaimed actress and you dress her up as a bird and just have her screech and do a silly dance while George Jefferson sings?  (Her Match Game appearance is classy in comparison.)  As for ten-year-old Natalie Gregory (probably seven at the time of filming) as Alice, she's OK.  Her wig looks really fake, but that's not her fault.  She's very American, but then so is most of the cast.

The writer is Paul Zindel, who may know how to write a quirky Young Adult novel, but did also contribute the screenplay for 1974's Mame.  As for the director, Harry Harris, he didn't work on any of my other shows, and the closest he ever got to an intentional comedy was Eight is Enough.  The worst part though is that the songs are by Steve Allen and they're almost uniformly dreadful.  In fact, both Zindel and S. Allen make the mistake of substituting their own material too much for Carroll's and there are no "Very Merry Unbirthday" moments here.  The absolute nadir is the Tea Party, where I was wincing the whole time.  The scenes with the Queen of Hearts are second worst, mostly but not entirely due to Meadows.

I thought maybe D+ was too harsh, and I did consider a C-, but the other complaint I have is that not only don't Harris, Zindel, Allen, and Allen seem to understand Lewis Carroll, but the program isn't even consistent within itself.  The relatively nice character of the Cheshire Cat is given a depressing song, while the thoroughly unpleasant Mad Hatter is given a song about laughter.  And Alice is told that she needs to grow up, when as we all know, she's just about the maturest seven-year-old in literature.

Selma Archerd, who was the 2nd PTA Lady on The Brady Bunch, plays the Queen of Diamonds.  Douglas Maida, who was a Ball Player on Who's the Boss? a few weeks earlier, is a Courtier here, while Fish Footman Scotch Byerley would be Gary on WtB.  Frog Footman Robert Axelrod would contribute "various voices" for the American version of Noozles.  John Walter Davis, who's the Seven of Spades, would be Ted Graham on Roseanne.

My review of the book is here:  http://rereadingeverybookiown.blogspot.com/2012/02/alices-adventures-in-wonderland.html.  Part 1 ends on a cliffhanger with the Jabberwocky, and technically into the Looking-Glass portion of the saga, presumably to get the audience to tune in for Part 2 the next night.  I don't think I would've at 17, but I did tape the three-hour back-to-back version that aired on cable a few years later, and would sometimes watch it in a train-wreck kind of way.  (Part 2 is better though.)