Ellen: Vows

Ellen: Vows
ABC
July 22, 1998
Sitcom
DVD
B

In this Cohen & Pratt story, helping Ellen's parents prepare to renew their vows causes Ellen and Laurie to get caught up in the romance.  But when Ellen proposes to Laurie, Laurie says no because the ceremony seems empty to her as long as it's not legal.  It would be another fifteen years before California legalized gay marriage, and television and so much else would change by then.  In its own way, this episode creates TV history: the first time the main character on a sitcom proposes a same-sex marriage.

It's nice to see Kathleen Noone and Brian Doyle-Murray finally appear together as Ellen's Aunt Ferne and Uncle Burt, he of course a real scene-stealer.  It does seem odd that their son Spence couldn't make it to the wedding, but whatever.

Ellen in its fifth and final season ranges from C to B+, averaging out to a B-.  Despite the common opinion that the show got "too gay," the missteps of this season are when the writers (and DeGeneres) forgot that the biggest pro-gay statement they could make was showing the humanity of their imperfect but good-hearted lesbian protagonist.  The series was at its most universal when it explored the ways that same-sex relationships are first and foremost relationships.  Oh, and the radio station stuff never worked, but that's only two episodes.

Farewell Ellen, farewell ABC sitcoms, at least for now.

Ellen: A Hollywood Tribute

Ellen: A Hollywood Tribute
ABC
May 13, 1998
Sitcom
DVD
B-

Linda Ellerbee hosts this hour-long mockumentary about Ellen's career, going back to the 1920s, with this sitcom starting in 1959.  The writing by Tim Doyle, who wrote a couple Roseanne episodes, is uneven but I like the various pastiches of different eras and styles.  My favorites are the 1950s guess-the-Commie game show and the early '70s cartoon about "Ellen and the Fun Bunch" (in outer space with the Harlem Globetrotters, of course).

Celebrities I didn't tag include Jennifer Aniston, Bea Arthur, Orson Bean, Richard Benjamin, Diahann Carroll, Glenn Close, Tim Conway, Cindy Crawford, Ted Danson, Woody Harrelson, Christine Lahti, Jada Pinkett Smith, and Mary Steenburgen.

Steven Anderson, who was a Young Man on The Bob Newhart Show in 1976 and Higgins on Three's Company in '81, is a Bookish Man here.  Jim Doughan played Amazing Dave on Who's the Boss? and is a Camera Assistant here.  Phil Leeds, who was on a few Roseanne episodes, is one of the Comedians here.  Man #1 Gene Allan Poe played a Salesman before.  Dan Finnerty, who previously was a Doorman on this show, plays both Crew Member Dan and Tom.

Ellen: Hospital

Ellen: Hospital
ABC
March 4, 1998
Sitcom
DVD
B-

Anne Heche returns in this Berry & Swartzlander story, this time as Laurie's ex Karen, although this is not immediately apparent.  Laurie got in a car accident after having lunch with Karen.  The episode has an odd feel to it, not only because of the mind games Karen is playing but because of the offscreen relationship between DeGeneres and Heche.  (They'd break up in 2000.)

Tyler Layton returns as Laurie's sister Leah.  This is Kayla Murphy's last appearance as Holly.  Laurie herself does not actually appear.

Ellen: The Funeral

Ellen: The Funeral
ABC
January 14, 1998
Sitcom
DVD
B

In this Matt Berry story, Ellen finds out that Laurie's father, who rejected Laurie when she came out, has recently died and Laurie doesn't want to go to the funeral.  Ellen is sweet and supportive throughout the episode.  And she also realizes that there are times to make a statement and times when there are other things going on.  Kayla Murphy returns as Holly and I like the continuing thread of her grandfather-granddaughter relationship with Ellen's dad, as well as the contrast between Ellen's supportive family and Laurie's family where only her sister has accepted her.

This is the 98th Ellen episode and it aired in '98.

Ellen: All Ellen, All the Time

Ellen: All Ellen, All the Time
ABC
December 3, 1997
Sitcom
DVD
C

Ric Swartzlander wrote this episode that doesn't really work.  Ellen gets a job at a radio station, where she meets Julie and Chuck (Susan Norfleet and Kevin McDonald, both of whom would return).  Julie is the boss but doesn't like dealing with people, while Chuck sexually harasses Ellen in what's meant to be a comical way.  (I'll admit I do like the Gene-Shalit mustache, which is also on his T-shirt caricature.)  When she bluntly tells him no, he runs off and she has to do the show for the next four hours.  I can see that they were trying to set things up so that Ellen could sort of do a one-woman performance piece, but it's clumsily handled and I don't buy that someone that for three and a half years we've seen as being too nice would choose to be obnoxious to draw in listeners.  The Ellen established on the series would've rambled about her childhood or sung a capella.  Nonetheless, she's a hit with the radio listeners and keeps this job.  (And Chuck comes back, not having learned his lesson, as the tag proves.)

DeGeneres's then girlfriend, Anne Heche, plays the Woman at Next Table who refuses to give her a napkin, and Heche would return in a different role.

Ellen: Like a Virgin

Ellen: Like a Virgin
ABC
November 26, 1997
Sitcom
DVD
B

This first of two Ellen stories by Jane Espenson sweetly and gently explores Ellen's nervousness about a possible "first time" with Laurie while Holly (Kayla Murphy) is away.  She gets advice from her friends (minus absent Joe) but mostly importantly she talks things out with Laurie.  What's interesting here, and I think not noticed with all of the hullaboo over "controversial content" (some of the episodes that season were given TV-14 ratings), is that the real taboo being shattered here is that an ABC sitcom couple talks things out and works on communication.  If only Tony and Angela had done this!  The real mature content is not what happens (offscreen) in the bedroom but what happens on the couch as Ellen and Laurie discuss "sleeping together" and end up literally sleeping together.

Ellen: Public Display of Affection

Getting their money's worth out of that movie theater set

Ellen: Public Display of Affection
ABC
November 12, 1997
Sitcom
DVD
B

Laurie meets Ellen's parents and things go pretty well, but Ellen, after initially hitting it off with Holly (Kayla Murphy in the first of five appearances), finds that Laurie's daughter doesn't like her.  It turns out that Laurie doesn't like how self-conscious Ellen is about PDA.  The two have a good talk and become friends.  This is probably David Walpert's best Ellen script, funny and believable.

It was twenty years ago today....This doesn't mean I have twenty years' worth of television still to go through.  Things are really going to trickle off after the '90s and we'll get through the twenty-first century PDQ.  But it is worth noting that this episode shows how far we've come on acceptance of LGBTetc. issues, including, in this case, self-acceptance.

Ellen: G.I. Ellen

Ellen: G.I. Ellen
ABC
November 5, 1997
Sitcom
DVD
C+

Ellen joins her father's Civil War reenactment group, where she has to deal with Sgt. Timko (Lou Gossett, Jr. in an obvious nod to his Officer and a Gentleman role).  Meanwhile, she suspects her father of having an affair with a "nurse" named Betsy (the still lovely Angie Dickinson).  This Mike Larsen story feels like a throwback to earlier seasons, since it has nothing to do with Ellen's struggles with her sexuality.  Paul Feig, who was Pete on Roseanne and who would go on to, among other things, direct the recent Ghostbusters, here plays Peterson. 

Ellen: Roommates

Ellen: Roommates
ABC
October 8, 1997
Sitcom
DVD
B

Dan Cohen and F.J. Pratt's first of two Ellen stories is so full of Three's-Company-like farce and misunderstandings that Mr. Roper shows up in the tag!  (Fell would die in December of the following year.)  Ellen thinks that the "roommates" across the street are lovers who are trying to set her up with a "roommate" of their own, and this makes Paige uncomfortable.  Then after Ellen of course embarrasses herself, Paige comes in and claims to be Ellen's "friend," not just her friend.  There are several funny lines here, and it's nice to see Audrey again.

Gail Mancuso, who directed 51 Roseanne episodes, here does her first of seven for Ellen.

Ellen: Hello Muddah, Hello Faddah

Ellen: Hello Muddah, Hello Faddah
ABC
May 7, 1997
Sitcom
DVD
B+

While this is less famous than the previous episode, it's still a very good and very important one.  Ellen comes out to her parents and surprisingly it's her father who has more of a problem with it.  Not that her mother is ready to give up on the hope of Ellen meeting Mr. Right, but her father doesn't even want to talk about her orientation.  They both come around in the end again of course, but along the way there is more pain and sadness than is typical for this series.  The scene with her father's "Morganville" train set is funny but also makes some points.  And of course her mother wants to fix her up with a single female doctor.

Juliana Morgan, here the Lesbian's Daughter, earlier was a Latte Customer.  Waiter James Hong looks much the same as he did as a nameless Man on The Bob Newhart Show a quarter century earlier; he was also Peking Tom on Soap (the character name typical of the lame humor of that series' last season) and Thomas Ping on Who's the Boss?  (But he must've been the only Asian-American actor of that era not on M*A*S*H.)  Laraine Newman is instantly recognizable as the Over-Supportive Parent, but I didn't realize till the credits that the moderator was a still female-identified Chastity (later Chaz) Bono.  Joan Jett rocks out in the title sequence.  Jan Nash, the writer of this episode, didn't work on any other of my shows.

Ellen: Reversal of Misfortune

Ellen: Reversal of Misfortune
ABC
March 4, 1997
Sitcom
DVD
B-

Matt Goldman wrote this story where Ellen encourages her almost divorced parents to get out and socialize (with her), only to have them decide they don't want to get divorced.  The separation was really a McGuffin anyway, just an excuse by the writers to get her into therapy and slowly prep us for her eventual coming out.  Not that I (or you) knew that at the time.

Clive Rosengren, who was a Plumber on Who's the Boss?, is Mitch here.  Then 70-year-old Jean Speegle Howard, who had been playing sweet old ladies since the '60s (e.g. the Widow Douglas in a 1975 TV-Movie of Huckleberry Finn) was Irene Cornelli on Roseanne and here is Bernadette.

Ellen: Secrets & Ellen

Ellen: Secrets & Ellen
ABC
February 26, 1997
Sitcom
DVD
C+

Seventy-seven-year-old veteran actress Eileen Heckart plays Ellen's eightysomething Grammy, whom the family lies to because she's so judgmental.  Meanwhile, Spence has an injury in Las Vegas, while dressed as a Roman soldier, so he wanders the casino deluded, bumping into stand-up comics who had contemporary ABC sitcoms and appear as those characters here (Drew Carey as Drew Carey, Brett Butler as Grace Kelly).  Wayne Newton is a Doctor here, about six years after he was himself on a Roseanne Vegas episode.  I did like a little of the family background, like about Lois's sister Ferne (Spence's mom), but this episode, written by someone who didn't work on any of my other shows, is mostly filler.

Ellen: Not So Great Expectations

Ellen: Not So Great Expectations
ABC
November 13, 1996
Sitcom
DVD
B-

In Ellen Idelson & Rob Lotterstein's first of two Ellen stories, Ellen's mother joins a video-dating service and meets Vic (the still handsome, then sixty-one-year-old Lyle Waggoner).  Ellen, who continues to take her parents' separation very seriously, tries to interfere of course, including at a country bar where Trisha Yearwood is performing.

Debra Mooney, who was Mrs. Wellman on Roseanne in '90, plays Barbara here.  Doorman Dan Finnerty would have two other Ellen roles.  And, yes, Devo appear as themselves in the title sequence, fourteen years after their Square Pegs episode.

Ellen: The Parent Trap

Fishers

Ellen: The Parent Trap
ABC
October 16, 1996
Sitcom
DVD
B-

In this Newman & Stark story, Ellen is still having trouble accepting her parents' separation, so she concocts a scheme that's like Hailey Mills and, as Spence notes in the umpteenth I Love Lucy comparison, like something out of classic TV.  But I thought of Gilligan's Island, where the scheme to recreate a romantic date for a couple in late middle age actually works, sexy redhead entertainer (Ginger rather than Paige) and all.  Here, they even get Eddie Fisher (Joely's father) to sing as he did in Cuba 1958.  But Harold and Lois can't be reconciled, yet anyway.  And Ellen goes back to Dr. Whitcomb (Paxton Whitehead), but he wants her to see other therapists, which she will, throughout the season, with surprising results.  Meanwhile we hear the word "gay" on the show for the first time, when Spence is being rude to Barrett while working for Paige.

Ellen: Splitsville, Man

Ellen: Splitsville, Man
ABC
October 2, 1996
Sitcom
DVD
C+

While there are definitely things I like about this story, Matt Goldman's first of two for Ellen, from the Captain & Tennille in the title sequence to Ellen teasing the audience with a line about her whole life maybe being a lie and she might actually be left-handed, it's hard for me to get past the scene of her humiliating her parents at her father's retirement party because she's so upset about the separation.  Note that Ellen is 34 and her parents have been together 37 years.  Ed, who last episode said he had a five-year-old, here has a four-year-old, confirming my theory that his daughters are close in age.  Also, this is the second episode where Ellen sits in one of the O's of the Hollywood sign, so they get to reuse that set.

John Petlock, who was a Minister on Who's the Boss? a decade earlier, is Uncle Jim here, while Pat Crawford Brown, who was Mary on WtB in '88, plays Rose.  John David Conti, who was Lou on Roseanne in '91, is Tom here.  Nancy Lenehan is again Margaret the realtor, here getting the last name Reed.

Ellen: Go Girlz

Ellen: Go Girlz
ABC
May 1, 1996
Sitcom
DVD
B-

In this DeBenedictis & Rowland story with a very '90s title, Paige and Matt have a fight over his bachelor party, but then she ends up having a wilder time at the slumber party that Ellen throws for her.  There's ominous foreshadowing about the wedding, although the resolution implies that it was really Spence's car that was in danger.  Note that this contains at least the third line of Audrey's this season about three girls drinking wine and doing another activity or two.

Staff writer Jonathan Stark appears onscreen as Gus.  Leno reads "funny headlines" in the title sequence.  Najimy's character of Paige's boss Lorna Irons is very different than her previous role of Adam's other best friend.

Ellen: Do You Fear What I Fear?

Ellen: Do You Fear What I Fear?
ABC
December 20, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
B-

Right before Ellen's parents leave for a tropical cruise in this David Flebotte story, they give her her birthday gifts, including a funeral plot.  She becomes seasonally depressed in a different way than most, and her friends have to cheer her up in the graveyard.  Ellen's new neighbor Tad (Jamie Kennedy) appears as holiday help at the bookstore, again doing that weird dance.

Ellen: She Ain't Friendly, She's My Mother

Trigger warning

Ellen: She Ain't Friendly, She's My Mother
ABC
November 8, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
B-

David Flebotte's first of seven Ellen scripts is marred by "sexual tension" between Spence and Paige, i.e. bickering like children and then flirting and then insulting some more.  Still, I liked seeing what was done with the plot of Ellen's mother trying to be her friend after undergoing therapy.  (If I recall correctly, Ellen's fears about her parents' marriage would come true in the next year and a half, leading to her own return to therapy.)

Sixty-nine-year-old Beverly Garland, who plays Eva, was last seen in my TV collection in the MST3K presentation of It Conquered the World, and she still looked great at this point.

Ellen: Thirty Kilo Man, Part 2

Note that Dan and Ellen have exactly the same taste in clothes.

Ellen: Thirty Kilo Man, Part 2
ABC
May 17, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
B

In this lesser but still fun second part, this time written by Maria Semple, Ellen finds out that Dan (William Ragsdale) is actually importing pizza supplies.  Her parents have a great little scene where they not only ship "Danellen" (Paige's term) as hard as I do, but they deal with "the Man," i.e. police, who turns out to be Jack (Patrick Warburton again).  Dan forgives Ellen for being suspicious and they enter three weeks of NRE (new relationship energy, although that term isn't used).  Paige resents Ellen blowing her off to be with Dan.  Meanwhile, Dan helps Adam see how attractive Audrey is and soon A/A is hotter than ever.  How this all works out, including the role Joe plays in it, is interesting to see. The final moments, where Ellen says she's going to be in a movie (1996's Mr. Wrong I assume) and Paige says she's going to be a Broadway star, is fourth-wall-breaking.  Ellen says Dan will be back in a week, but in fact two very significant years would pass before his return.

Noelle Hannibal is again an uncredited Customer, and Dean Fortunato is again a Nameless Man.

Ellen in Season Two ranges from C to B+, almost half of those as B-s, so it's not surprising that the average is B- like Season One, although a high B- this time.  This cast seems better defined than "These Friends of Mine," and when the show works, it works well.  This was at a time when I was watching less TV (I'd gone back to college after the divorce), but I still caught my Wednesday night funny ladies when I could.  I don't know if at the time I realized that Ellen was finding itself and Roseanne was slowly losing itself, but it seems obvious now.  I don't remember much about Season Three of Ellen specifically, except that I think the core cast was kept intact, for now....

Ellen: Thirty Kilo Man, Part 1

Previously on Ellen

Ellen: Thirty Kilo Man, Part 1
ABC
May 10, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
B+

It's a shame Vicki S. Horwitz didn't work on any other of my shows, because her script is easily the best of the season (unless Part 2 tops it of course).  Dan (William Ragsdale) returns from Italy after six months and he's no longer delivering pizzas but is instead in the international import/export business.  They start seeing each other again and fall in love, but then she starts to suspect he's a drug smuggler.  Before that suspicion, Ellen is deliriously happy, and her female friends are happy for her that she's, one, in love, and two, had sex.  (Adam starts to regret moving out, as if feeling threatened that Dan may move in, and Joe is seldom happy anyway.)  Meanwhile, Audrey's cop boyfriend is jealous of Adam, which is of course Audrey's fault.

The episode is playful, from opening to closing credits (President Clinton gives Ellen a fancy VCR in the flashbacks, and both the main plot and the subplots are "to be continued"), sweet, romantic, and very funny.  Obviously, Ellen, even more than Roseanne's Jackie, can't be happy with a man for long (and not just because this character will eventually come out), since this is a show about singles.  But it is charming to see Ellen so giddy, and I was and am a hardcore Ellen/Dan shipper.  I don't remember what happens in Part 2, so it'll be interesting to see how this is resolved.

Patrick Warburton, who was Brent earlier in the year, is Jack here and in Part 2.  Noelle Hannibal makes another of her uncredited appearances as a Customer, while Dean Fortunato would again be a nameless Man on Part 2.  And Jerry Penacoli plays Paige's date Richard in a flashback (a man she's already forgotten, although Dan asks about him).  Note that Paige claims to have dated approximately 100 men.