Roseanne: Aliens

Roseanne: Aliens
ABC
May 12, 1992
Sitcom
DVD
B+

Joel Madison wrote the story with Ron Nelson (who has very few credits, none on my other shows), but the teleplay with Jeff Abugov, and it contains the following:

• Becky finding out that due to her family's financial struggles, there's no money for her to attend more than community college, despite her great grades;
• Leon turning out to be human, trying to find his waitresses (whose last day is now here) new jobs and bringing in sparkling cider;
• Roseanne making a political candidate regret his door-to-door campaigning, twice, by talking about the economy;
• Arnie leaving Nancy a note that he's being kidnapped by aliens, and then in the tag this proving to be true;
• Nancy seeing Jackie having had a "relationship" with Arnie as a bonding thing for them, when Jackie would just as soon that everyone forget about it; 
• DJ (again called David Jacob) winning the school spelling bee, with his family rooting him on, and his parents knowing it's in the bag when his last word is "foreclosure";
• and a celebratory ice cream fight.

Steve Kramer was the English voice of Wilde Wolf on Maple Town and is Roger's Father here.  Teacher Anna Gee Byrd had played a Nurse on Who's the Boss?  Clint Allmon and Jeff Heston would return as Aliens #1 and #2.  Thanks to appearances elsewhere, this is the 100th show of mine for Roseanne Barr (well, Roseanne Arnold at that point).

Roseanne in its fourth season ranges from B- to A-, averaging out to an impressive B.  There are none of the big missteps like in previous seasons (e.g. Roseanne's dream of murdering her family), and even the Bowmans don't wreck the show.  Season Four is wise and wisecracking, with moments of drama and reality, from emotional to financial, as well as silliness, as this episode amply demonstrates.  That the tonal shifts are smooth rather than awkward is to the credit of director Weyman, the writers, and of course the chemistry-rich cast.  We believe in the Conners and company and we can't wait to see where life takes them next.

Roseanne: Secrets

Roseanne: Secrets
ABC
April 28, 1992
Sitcom
DVD
B-

This is the only Roseanne story by Lawrence H. Levy, who wrote one Who's the Boss? episode, oddly enough with the word "Secret" in the title ("Marie's Secret").  The big secret here is that Dan covers for Mark when the latter gets drunk and punches a jukebox at the Lobo Lounge.  I assume the intention was to show Dan and Mark further bonding, but I don't like Dan keeping it from Roseanne, and then Jackie blabs to her.  Perhaps there will be fallout later.  Meanwhile, Chuckie has lost his job at Wellman.  (And, yes, I'm again omitting poor James Pickens, Jr., because of overcrowded tags.)  Note that this is the episode that first mentions Arnie encountering aliens, and it would be funny if Levy just threw that in there and then the regular staff writers decided to run with it.

Jim Staskel played Thug #2 on the "Force Boxman" episode of It's Garry Shandling's Show and is Kelvin here.  Don Maxwell makes his third and last appearance as Willy, while Dan Butler is Art for the third and last, and Michael Dempsey is Ray for the second and last.

Roseanne: Deliverance

Roseanne: Deliverance
ABC
March 31, 1992
Sitcom
DVD
B

Chuck Lorre wrote the story, Abugov & Madison the teleplay.  The title refers to Crystal giving birth to a daughter in the eighth month, but the more interesting threads* are about Leon leaving the coffee shop and Roseanne and Bonnie both wanting to replace him; and David learning to give Darlene some space, even though he keeps dropping by for dinner.  (Later we'll learn more about David's home life and see that it's not simply that he wants to be around Darlene.)  Note that Roseanne says that Bonnie ties with Nancy and Anne-Marie for third best friend, after Jackie and Crystal.

*Sorry, Crystal, but it's pretty clear that the writers and others agree, since we could see the conversation between you and Lonnie (Kristopher Kent Hill), but instead we go out into the hallway to focus on Roseanne making up with Bonnie.

Roseanne: Lies

Roseanne: Lies
ABC
March 24, 1992
Sitcom
DVD
B

Foster & Youngers wrote the teleplay based on Abugov's story, and the title has more to do with the subplot, where Roseanne is nervous about taking a lie detector test at work.  The more interesting thread is that Darlene doesn't know how to react when David puts his arm around her on the couch.  She's afraid to spoil their friendship, and it's clear that he's the best friend she's ever had.  She talks to Dan and then Becky, who give good advice, which eats away at an already stressed Roseanne, since this is exactly the kind of thing she wants Darlene to confide in her about.  Roseanne does like that David confides in her (watch Bonnie's priceless reaction in the background when Roseanne straight up lies about how slow she and "Mr. Conner" took things at first), and that David thinks his brother is a jerk.  In the end, Darlene gives David a big kiss, which he returns.  And the D/D ship sets sail, on a rocky but mostly successful voyage.

Walter Jacobson makes his last appearance as Walter.

Roseanne: The Commercial Show

Roseanne: The Commercial Show
ABC
March 3, 1992
Sitcom
DVD
B


The Bowmans are moving back to Chicago.  (Meagen Fay and Danton Stone play their roles for the last time, but Adam Hendershott is the new and final Todd.)  Todd and DJ get in an argument because they don't want to admit how much they'll miss each other.  The moms have to make peace, and there's a funny exchange about Roseanne's "stick up her butt" remark that got repeated by DJ to Todd to Kathy.  I don't think the Bowmans really worked well on the show, but this is a fine exit.

Meanwhile, Rodbell's is having a commercial shot on location and Roseanne gets Leon, who's just broken up with his boyfriend, to let her family be in it.  (She plans to skim off some of the $50 each that they'll receive, but she gets caught.)  Not only is Roseanne replaced by Jackie as "the mom," but poor Darlene has to wear pigtails and a flowery dress.  I suspect Goranson's laughter is genuine, and who could blame her?  Note the wall-breaking Emmy joke Roseanne makes.

The story is Lapiduss & Lorre's but the teleplay is Lapiduss & Heath's.  Sip Culler was Mr. Johnson on What's Happening!! and J. Bubba-Hampton on Welcome Back, Kotter, while here he's Steve.  And, yes, that's d.j. Rick Dees as Ken.

Roseanne: Less Is More

Roseanne: Less Is More
ABC
February 11, 1992
Sitcom
DVD
B

The series again deals with subjects not then seen on sitcoms.  This time, Roseanne considers and then goes through with breast reduction surgery, because of her continuing back troubles.  (Remember, seven years earlier, ABC was skittish about the "Samantha's first bra" episode, and you would never have heard the word "breast," let alone "nipple" then, even if it was about Mona's bras.)  We see how the family (minus DJ) react, including Dan wanting to be supportive because he knows this is related to her health, but also having to get used to the idea of the woman he's loved for twenty years changing her body.  Roseanne's friends, including a maybe five-months-pregnant at this point (although there's still frost on the ground) Crystal, show their support with jokes and balloons and musings on men's breast fixation.  It feels like this is something too big to be wrapped up in one half-hour episode, but it's well handled under the circumstances.

In the wall-breaking tag, Arnold talks to Goodman about the scene in the kitchen (where Roseanne coaxes a nervous Dan into kissing and touching her).  Arnold says he was locked in his trailer and missed it, so Goodman says he played it as Arnold advised, ending with a platonic handshake.  Arnold, in an even more laugh-out-loud than at the time line says, "I love being a producer!"

D'Anne Avner makes her second appearance on the show, presumably again as a Woman in the Coffee Shop, while Rick Spector's second appearance is as another Customer, and Customer Susan Krebs was Nurse Gleason on M*A*S*H.  Walter Jacobson is back as Walter.  Neil Patrick Harris, then 18, guest-stars as his Dr. Doogie Howser character in Roseanne's nightmare, to the delight of the studio audience.  Amy Sherman wrote the story that Foster & Lapiduss based their teleplay on.  This is the first episode Mancuso has directed this season, maybe because it's a more "female" episode than usual.

Roseanne: The Bowling Show

Roseanne: The Bowling Show
ABC
January 21, 1992
Sitcom
DVD
B

Obviously this wasn't the only bowling show in the series, since there was a first season episode set at the alley.  But the bowling is the least interesting aspect of this episode, which contains the following:

• David Crosby makes his only appearance as Bonnie's musician husband Duke, singing one of his own songs ("Thousand Roads," which sounds better here than on the acoustic CSN concert of a few months ago), as well as a fine aduet with Bonnie;
• Chuck (Pickens, sorry, again dropped from my limited tags) gets more to do than usual, this time using Dan and Arnie's anger at each other to make them bowl better;
• Nancy and Jackie bond and Roseanne is jealous;
• And most significant of all, 16-year-old Johnny Galecki appears as Mark's brother "Kevin Healy."  He's babysitting DJ, since Mark showed up several hours late for his date with Becky.  When Darlene enters, there's instance attraction, which Dan thinks is cute, till he finds out who Kevin is.  This happens in the tag and may've been meant as a throwaway, but it would have long-ranging impact.

Don Foster wrote the story that Abugov & Sherman turned into a teleplay.  Michael Dempsey plays Dan's friend Ray for the first of two times.  This is the 1400th sitcom episode I've reviewed.

Roseanne: Bingo

Roseanne: Bingo
ABC
January 7, 1992
Sitcom
DVD
B

Tom Arnold (who appears in one scene) and Robert Miranda (who had been Andy in earlier seasons) wrote the story that Madison & Youngers based the teleplay on.  It's another girls' night out (minus Jackie) and Crystal suggests bingo.  She and Roseanne quarrel and we later find out that Crystal is pregnant again, although she's been breastfeeding nine-month-old Little Ed.  Roseanne becomes addicted to bingo, as Jackie realizes when she accompanies her sister to the church.

Mitzi McCall, who plays Peg, was the voice of Penny on The Pebbles and Bamm-Bamm Show and would be Rochelle Shapiro on Ellen.  Priest David Sage was Don Lester on Who's the Boss?  The peerless Edie McClurg plays Harriet.

Roseanne: Santa Claus

Roseanne: Santa Claus
ABC
December 24, 1991
Sitcom
DVD
B

Barry Vigon wrote the story that Lapiduss & Lorre made into a teleplay, and, yes, it's sort of about Christmas, but not exactly.  Since the job playing Mrs. Claus at Rodbell's department store pays $7.50 versus $10 for Santa, Roseanne cross-dresses as a feminist gesture, and for the under the table cash.  She meets Darlene's new friend, who turns out to be Roseanne's age and the owner of a bookstore.  Roseanne feels confused and jealous about Karen Miller (another nice turn for Lee Garlington, who'd memorably played Ms. Foster from the IRS on Who's the Boss?, although I don't remember her '89 role on Roseanne as Carole Karoszek).  Finding out that there's a whole hidden side to Darlene, writing sci-fi short stories, doesn't help.

Walter Jacobson returns as Walter from the appliance store, doing another mini-rant.  Julianne Michelle, who's a nameless Child here, had been on the most recent episode of Who's the Boss? as Katie Havlock, while Ross Malinger, who's Sammy Miller, played three different roles in the "Billy season" of WtB.

Roseanne: Stressed to Kill

Roseanne: Stressed to Kill
ABC
November 19, 1991
Sitcom
DVD
B

Abugov & Lapiduss wrote the teleplay based on a story by Myer & Lorre, which might explain why the episode is about Roseanne but also has moments where other characters are interacting, like Becky & Darlene in two pivotal scenes.  Roseanne has been secretly smoking for the past few months, due to all the stress in her life, including from Becky going on the Pill.  Dan, who's wonderfully sweet and supportive, helps her give up smoking, but she becomes even more stressed of course.  Meanwhile, Becky writes an essay for Darlene, wanting to help her but also resenting all the attention Darlene's depression is getting while Becky holds down the fort at home.  Roseanne acknowledges this in a scene with Becky, and she reluctantly agrees to let Mark come to Thanksgiving (which will be next week's episode).

Stephen Lee was Bruiser on Who's the Boss? and is Barnie here.  (Amusingly, he'd play Tom Arnold in the 1994 TV-movie Roseanne and Tom: Behind the Scenes, which I have not seen.)  Tony Edwards would be a Customer three years later, although by then I think it was at the loose meat restaurant.

Roseanne: Tolerate Thy Neighbor

Oh, and Jackie is studying for a trucking exam, and
Darlene is still wearing black but seems less depressed.

Roseanne: Tolerate Thy Neighbor
ABC
October 15, 1991
Sitcom
DVD
B-

I don't know what it is, but the writing and/or directing quality seems to decline slightly when it's about the Baumans (Meagen Fay and Danton Stone again).  According to IMDB, Mull's "original [sic] extremely tight script" that he cowrote with Maxine Lapiduss went through several other writers.  I suspect that the original had more resolution for the subplot about Leon's live-in boyfriend of three years, Steven (Michael Des Barres again), and Leon's unseen visiting mother.  Still, there are some cute moments and good lines.  Yes, the lines about Jackie hypothetically being gay are ironic in retrospect.

Carl Franklin makes his first of two appearances as Officer Gil Robbins.  Bob Hope, then 88, appears in the tag.  This is the 1200th show I've reviewed that aired on ABC, still the dominant network in my collection.

Roseanne: Darlene Fades to Black

Roseanne: Darlene Fades to Black
ABC
October 8, 1991
Sitcom
DVD
B

Jeff Abugov wrote this episode that's another that goes into previously unexplored (by most family sitcoms anyway) territory.  High school freshman Darlene is going through a listless depression.  She quits the basketball team and just wants to lie around and watch TV.  She also buys a black outfit.  Meanwhile, Becky's wish to buy a scooter leads to arguments among her and her parents.  And Jackie is indeed going to trucking school.

Walter Jacobson makes his first of four appearances as Walter.

Roseanne: Why Jackie Became a Trucker

Roseanne: Why Jackie Became a Trucker
ABC
October 1, 1991
Sitcom
DVD
B

Chuck Lorre wrote this episode which does indeed explain why Jackie becomes a trucker.  She runs into Gary offscreen and becomes depressed, especially since he's now engaged.  Also offscreen, she gets drunk and sleeps with Arnie, who's still engaged to Nancy.  But we don't know this when the episode opens and it looks like the plot is going to be about D.J. wanting to keep the dog he got in a trade with a friend.  Dan has a poker night, including Leon, so Roseanne has a girls' night out.  But Jackie is more depressed than ever and when she tells the other women, they're horrified.  (We learn that Arnie went to high school with Roseanne and her friends.)  Meanwhile, the guys are surprised to find out Leon is gay but they're mostly accepting.  (Arnie has a funny line where he swaps out Andy Griffith for sleeping with Melanie Griffith.)  Anyway, Jackie decides to make some changes in her life, so, yes, she's going to become a trucker.

I again have to omit James Pickens, Jr. because of excessive tags, but he does have a funny line about "gay Bill in Chicago."  Michael Traeger wouldn't return as Marvin till '94.

Roseanne: Take My Bike, Please

Roseanne: Take My Bike, Please
ABC
September 24, 1991
Sitcom
DVD
B

Mark Rosewater's first of two stories for the series was turned into a teleplay by Bob Myer.  As the title suggests, it's about Dan's bike shop but also about the impact that launching the business has on the family, especially since Roseanne is working there as well as at Rodbell's.  She hopes to sell a motorcyle so that they can hire someone.  Meanwhile, Becky and Darlene bicker like a married couple over housework, cooking, and childcare.  Poor D.J. doesn't speak for two days and nobody notices.  Jackie also has made a career change, now working as perfume girl at the mall, which seems to necessitate her wearing a series of unflattering, but I suppose possibly fashionable by early '90s standards, outfits.  (Sorry, I couldn't find any in my image search, but one is red with lots of zippers.)

Dan Butler makes his first of three appearances as Art, the newly divorced accountant who buys the motorcycle.

Roseanne: Scenes from a Barbecue

Roseanne: Scenes from a Barbecue
ABC
May 7, 1991
Sitcom
DVD
B

Shelley Winters makes her first of ten appearances as Roseanne's beloved Nana Mary.  At 70, she was too young to plausibly be 38-year-old Barr's grandmother, let alone the mother of the (unseen in this episode) 63-year-old Estelle Parsons, but no matter.  She looks and acts enough like Roseanne, that when she says Roseanne will be her in 40 years, we believe it.*  Writers Myer & Lorre are a bit heavy-handed about how everyone in the family adores Nana, which keeps this from being a B+.  Still, it's a solid third-season episode, without much plot but a lot of character interaction, from Nana assuring the black Mitchells she's not prejudiced, to the men's argument about how to BBQ.  The highlight is of course Bonnie surprising her friends with her beautiful voice for "You Really Got a Hold On Me" during the singalong.  (If I remember correctly, David Crosby would later show up as her referred to but not yet seen husband Duke, and we'd get a delicious duet.)

Kristopher Kent Hill returns as Lonnie.  James Pickens, Jr. and Adilah Barnes are back as Chuck and Anne-Marie, but I had to cut someone out of my excessive tags.  This is the only episode where we see Chuck, Jr., who's 16.


*Having read autobiographies by both women, I can say that Winters and Barr were quite a bit alike in real life as well, from being Jewish and "loud-mouthed" to having been pregnant as teenagers.  Their politics, at least at the time, were also similar.  But, yes, the physical resemblance is striking.

Roseanne: Dances with Darlene

Fashions have improved since two or three years earlier.

Roseanne: Dances with Darlene
ABC
April 30, 1991
Sitcom
DVD
B

This Brad Isaacs story has parallels to the episode where Roseanne went with Becky to buy a dress for a dance, but even more so to the Who's the Boss? episode where Angela tried to take over Sam's prom night.  Both Sam and Darlene are tomboys, but Sam grew up to be a more feminine girl, who likes dresses and makeup and all that, while Darlene likes boys and dating but not all the "crap" that goes with them.  When Barry (unseen) asks Darlene to a dance, Roseanne makes a big fuss, which Darlene particularly resents because Roseanne is indifferent to Darlene's athletics.  Meanwhile, the restaurant is being evaluated, and the evaluator wants to bed Leon.  We find out that Leon is gay, when his boyfriend, Jerry Gimbel (Michael Des Barres in his first of three Roseanne roles), shows up.  Note that Roseanne's line about Darlene possibly punishing her by dating Mark's hypothetical little brother would end up resonating through most of the series, and indeed Sara Gilbert's life.

Roseanne: Vegas Interruptus

It's the '90s and the hairstyles are still unflattering.

Roseanne: Vegas Interruptus
ABC
February 26, 1991
Sitcom
DVD
B

Abugov, Lorre, and Myer wrote this story where Dan and Roseanne plan to fly to Vegas for the weekend, despite, one, her boss Leon changing her schedule, and two, their daughters planning a party.  (D.J. will stay with Crystal, who's now visibly pregnant, a month or so after the wedding.)  Roseanne reluctantly agrees to go, but she doesn't want to lose this job, especially since she likes Bonnie.  (As do I, more Bonnie please!)  Jackie plays party chaperone, threatening to wear her cop uniform, which I guess she didn't have to turn in when she quit the force.

From the title, I had this one mixed up with the one where D & R go to Vegas with Arnie & Nancy, but in this one they get snowed in in Chicago.  The episode never quite becomes classic, but there are some great moments, from Jackie's reaction to being hit on by a senior, to two boys fighting over Darlene: Brian (Matt Norero again) and Barry Parker (Tristan Tait again).  Also, the tag, where D & R dance to a Wayne Newton record and tell each other happy lies captures what's so magic about them as a couple.  Note that Mark is referred to but not seen.

Susan Quick was Heather Dolan on That Girl and Gloria Thompson on The Brady Bunch, as well as Lady #2 here.  Nick Toth, who was Mr. Powell in A Very Brady Christmas and The Bradys, gets to deliver the episode's funniest line, as Capt. Johnson.  Man #2, Rick Spector, would be a Customer the next year.

Roseanne: Valentine's Day

Roseanne: Valentine's Day
ABC
February 12, 1991
Sitcom
DVD
B

There are a lot of things going on in this episode, some of more significance in retrospect than at the time:

• We meet Roseanne's equally sarcastic and heavy co-worker Bonnie Watkins (played by Bonnie Sheridan of Delaney & Bonnie, and, yes, we'll hear her sing later), as well as their new manager Leon Carp (the incomparable Martin Mull).  Finally, she'll be at a workplace that can hold its own with the family scenes!
• The story, written by Bob Myer, has two main plots about, yes, Valentine's Day.  In the less interesting one, Dan is too embarrassed to buy Roseanne lingerie, although he tries.  (Arnie shows up in the store, presumably shopping for a gift for Nancy.)
• The other thread is again one that is somewhat like a Brady plot, with the tomboy middle girl trying to impress an older boy, only to have him interested in her more confident older sister.  The difference here is that, rather than Jan simply putting on a dress and having the boy immediately see her as no longer "a guy," it seems to be physically and emotionally painful, but also very funny, for Darlene to try to femme it up.  (The tag has bloopers of Barr cracking up at Gilbert.)
• That Gilbert would much later come out as a lesbian, give this an added subtext.
• Rather than cattily saying something like Marcia's "Don't blame me if boys don't find you attractive," Becky does genuinely try to be a good older sister, including in some scenes that are described rather than shown.
• Roseanne's meddling does not turn out as well as Carol Brady's.

The boy that Darlene likes that likes Becky is Barry Parker (Tristan Tait, who would return later that season).  Molly David, who's the Woman in the Coffee Shop, would be a Sweet Old Woman on Ellen.  And, yes, that's 15-year-old Tobey Maguire as Jeff.