Roseanne: Into That Good Night

Roseanne: Into That Good Night
ABC
May 20, 1997
Sitcom
DVD
B

This one-hour series conclusion was co-written by Allan Stephan, Barr, and her daughters Jessica and Jennifer Pentland.  Whether this is how the series or the season should've ended is still subject to debate, especially with a Roseanne revival next year.  But it is entertaining and sometimes moving in of itself.  Of course I don't want Dan to be dead, or David and Darlene to be split up, but I get the point that Roseanne, both Barr and Conner, wanted to rewrite the way life goes.  It doesn't justify or explain the madness of Season Nine, but it's not a bad place to "end."

I'm omitting not only Cole Roberts and the Hazen twins, but also Sandra Bernhard, Martin Mull, and Fred Willard, although I think it's interesting that none of Roseanne's straight friends are included in the baby's homecoming.  Note that Goranson is tagged for the flashback to when Roseanne's writing room was set up in the basement.

Roseanne's final season ranges from two D-s to one B+, averaging out to a C+.  There are still good moments, good episodes, but more rarely than in previous seasons.  In some ways, this show resembles M*A*S*H, a sitcom with serious and even dark moments, running perhaps too long and yet still capable of making me cry as it ends.  (And both shows have a ton of continuity errors of course.)  It'll be interesting to see what happens in "Season Ten," but I expect to be done with this blog before that airs.

Roseanne: Arsenic and Old Mom

Roseanne: Arsenic and Old Mom

ABC

May 13, 1997
Sitcom
DVD
D-

Time has not made this episode any less painful.  In fact, knowing that Carrie Fisher and Debbie Reynolds would die so close together makes this collaboration even more of a waste.  It ties for my least favorite episode of the series, with the spa episode. 

Dan's mother Audrey (played here by Reynolds) is released from "the hospital," supposedly all well, as long as she takes her meds.  She doesn't and decides to kill Dan for institutionalizing her, twenty years ago!  The script is by Fisher and I can't help wishing that a more realistic, funnier, and sweeter story could've been submitted instead.  Why drag Goodman back, when his performance shows how little he wants to be doing this story?  And there's even a gratuitous joke about D.J. lusting after Princess Leia, just so Grandma can hit him for it, which is even less funny considering who wrote the joke.  This episode is to be avoided by all but the masochistic and/or completist.  (So of course it gets high ratings on IMDB.)

Heather Matarazzo makes her last appearance as Heather.  Staff writer Lawrence Broch plays the Doctor.  This is a rare episode without Laurie Metcalf.

Roseanne: The Truth Be Told

Roseanne: The Truth Be Told
ABC
March 18, 1997
Sitcom
DVD
C+

This Broch & Winchell story is never anywhere near as sharply satirical as it thinks it is, but there are some pretty good moments.  Roseanne gets a chance to sell her life story to network TV-- ABX-- and to the Home Movie Channel (HMC).  Meanwhile, Bev and Leon tell embarrassing stories about the Conners to a reporter from the tabloids, and unless we think they're very drunk and/or stupid, we have to assume that they're passive-aggressively seeking to embarrass Roseanne.

Ruta Lee returns as Bev's girlfriend Joyce.  Bob Fuller makes his final Roseanne appearance as the Clothing Salesman, while this time Johnny Dark is Frank Andrews.  Goodman's voice is heard offscreen, presumably prerecorded.

Roseanne: The Miracle

Roseanne: The Miracle
ABC
February 25, 1997
Sitcom
DVD
B+

Barr wrote the story that Drew Ogier turned into a teleplay, and it shows what they were capable of when they stuck to the family dynamic and left out the lottery etc.  Yes, Roseanne wants to use her money to help her granddaughter survive, but the episode is mostly about the emotions that this closeknit, if often bickering family goes through when Darlene gives birth prematurely and the baby has a small chance of survival.  (Darlene is still only twenty-eight weeks along, so the pregnancy math on this series remains screwy.)  I cried more than once, partly because I've grown to love these characters again, especially David and Darlene, and it's hard to see them in such pain.  Galecki and Gilbert really step up to the acting challenge, particularly together.  Goodman is of course another standout, as he helps David stay strong for Darlene.  The idea of baby Harris being healed by love is corny, but it's all well done.  I realize not every Season Nine episode could be like this, not without crossing into permanent dramedy status, but I'm glad that they at least made this one.

Rick Fitts played Martin Jackson on Generations, but not on the episodes I reviewed; he was a Reporter on Ellen and is a nameless Doctor here.  Michael Des Barres was also on Ellen, as Nigel the Director, and had played two previous Roseanne roles before his appearance here as Dr. Phillips.  Dann Florek returns as Dr. Rudmen.

Roseanne: A Second Chance

Roseanne: A Second Chance
ABC
February 18, 1997
Sitcom
DVD
B

Cynthia Mort wrote this story where Dan and Roseanne reconcile and Darlene goes into early labor, at seven months.  Lots of drama again, with some humor, and the performances by Goodman, Barr, and Gilbert keep this from getting too soapy.  Note that David is in Chicago but it's not explained why.  Did he take the graphic artist job after all, despite his in-laws winning the lottery?

Darlene's Doctor is played by Dann Florek, who was Principal Hiller before, as well as Mr. Woodruff on Ellen; he'd be back in this role on the following episode and get the last name Rudmen.

Roseanne: Hit the Road Jack

Roseanne: Hit the Road Jack
ABC
January 14, 1997
Sitcom
DVD
B-

Barr wrote this downer episode where Roseanne C spends most of the episode driving around, listening to the radio, and eating junk food, as she avoids Dan before he flies back to California.  Fishman gets a rare chance to show his dramatic chops, when D.J. yells at Dan, and then later in the episode he meets a quirky girl, Heather (Danzaly named Heather Matarazzo in her first of four appearances in the role), who shares his love of film.

Roseanne: Say It Ain't So

Roseanne: Say It Ain't So
ABC
January 7, 1997
Sitcom
DVD
B

This Nancy Steen story is definitely more drama than comedy, with the comic subplot being D.J. wanting to film Darlene's birth but grossed out by the videotape of her (unseen) friend Janet's birth.  It's the day after Christmas and Jackie confronts Dan about the phone call she overheard.  It turns out he has feelings for his mother's nurse but they haven't (yet?) had sex.  Jackie says that if Dan doesn't tell Roseanne, she will. Dan eventually does and both he and Roseanne say this wouldn't have happened if not for the lottery money.  Jackie is the audience surrogate, sharing our anger and disappointment in Dan, although of course in retrospect we know that it didn't "really" happen like that.  Nonetheless, at this moment in time, in the middle of the final season, early in 1997, a near perfect husband and father has failed his family and us.

Note that Darlene is 25 weeks along, which means she would've conceived in early July, which doesn't exactly match up to her plans in the proposal episode to take summer classes, or to D.J. worrying about missing school for the Disney World trip.

Roseanne: Home for the Holidays

Roseanne: Home for the Holidays
ABC
December 17, 1996
Sitcom
DVD
B

Barr wrote the story that Lawrence Broch based the teleplay on, but this is no flight of absurd fancy.  Dan comes home and is warmly welcomed by his family and the studio audience.  However, something feels off, especially in his treatment of Roseanne.  Jackie overhears him talking to someone he misses, someone who looks after his mother.  She and we realize that Dan is having an affair.  The fallout would begin in the next episode.

Allan Stephan's last onscreen role is Santa Claus in the tag.  Note that the Christmas episode of four years before (with everyone snowed in at various locations) was called "It's No Place Like Home for the Holidays."

Roseanne: Honor Thy Mother

Roseanne: Honor Thy Mother
ABC
October 8, 1996
Sitcom
DVD
B-

In this story that Bob Nickman co-wrote with someone who didn't work on any other of my shows, we don't find out what the title means until far into the episode.  Dan is a funk, wondering about the meaning of life since the family became rich.  He realizes he wants to help his mom by taking her to a good psychiatric hospital in Santa Monica.  Meanwhile, Roseanne and Jackie plan a trip to a spa, which would become a plot in a couple episodes, but first we'll see an episode that builds on the tag, which includes the back of a head and voice of a character that (uncredited here, to keep it mysterious) would be played by Jim "Ernest" Varney.

Staff writer Allan Stephan here plays Allan.  This is James Pickens, Jr.'s last appearance as Chuck and I'm glad he's given something meaty to work with for a change, in the scene where he tries to talk to Dan.  Note that this is at least Leon's third time playing poker with Dan.  And sweet David's complaint about Darlene is that she won't let him spoil her.

Roseanne: What a Day for a Daydream

Roseanne: What a Day for a Daydream
ABC
October 1, 1996
Sitcom
DVD
C

This Kaplan & Testa story is a good example of the schizophrenia of this series, especially in its later years.  Richard Kaplan wrote the best episode of Season Eight, where Darlene announces her pregnancy, while Garland Testa wrote "Springtime for David," one of the odd fantasy episodes of that season.  And here some pretty good scenes of the family sitting around the dinner table (apparently eating more veggies than they used to) are interspersed with Roseanne's pointless daydreams about Jerry Springer, Playboy, and the Miss Universe pageant.  I'm not entirely against fantasy sequences of course, but I don't believe that they always work on this show.

Master of Ceremonies Johnny Dark, who was Danny on the "daydream" episode of Just the Ten of Us, would return as Frank Andrews.  Audience Member Tory Christopher was Cousin Conner on the previous episode, while Audience Member Stella Butler would be Nurse Stella on an episode later that year.  And, yes, it was weird today watching the now recently deceased Hugh Hefner on a show from over twenty years ago, when he was already an elderly icon.

This was Roseanne's 200th episode, and thus John Goodman's 200th appearance on this blog.  That (not because of my blog) is why the cake is rolled in when Michael Fishman wants to do an Emmy-worthy scene as Moses.

Roseanne: Millions from Heaven

With Robin Leach

Roseanne: Millions from Heaven
ABC
September 24, 1996
Sitcom
DVD
B

Nancy Steen's first of two Roseanne stories, and Cynthia Mort's penultimate of six, picks up where the last episode left off.  Jackie comes over, with the babies, and tells Roseanne about winning the lottery.  She and then Dan react.  At least at this point, the shark isn't dining.  This is a funny episode, if bittersweet in retrospect about the Conners' intentions to not let money change them.  Had this been any other sitcom we've looked at, it would turn out they didn't win the lottery and life would go back to normal.  (As happened, for instance, on Gilligan's Island.)  Note that Darlene is more emotional due to pregnancy hormones.

Tory Christopher, who's a Conner cousin here, would be an Audience Member later in the year.  This is the last we'll see of Adilah Barnes as Anne-Marie; I wish they'd found more to do with her character, especially in recent seasons.  I'm less concerned about the loss of John McConnell as Bob, although he did what he could with the role.  I'm omitting Cole Roberts and the Hazen twins from the overcrowded tags.

Roseanne: Call Waiting

Roseanne: Call Waiting
ABC
September 17, 1996
Sitcom
DVD
B

"What doesn't kill us is making us stronger...."  As Season Nine opens in this Ogier & Stephan story, five days have passed and Roseanne, who's staying at Jackie's, refuses to speak to Dan.  Darlene and David (who've been married eight days), and then Mark and D.J., come over to try to reconcile her with Dan.  But it takes imagining herself into Nick at Nite shows to make her realize that her relationship with Dan is better than most.  (The parodies/tributes are surprisingly good, especially the costumes.)  She goes home and she and Dan make up.  In a tag which would change the series even more, Jackie watches the lottery and realizes that she and Roseanne have picked the winning numbers.  Certainly a more upbeat cliffhanger than the last one.  Note that Asner appears briefly when Lou Grant reenters the room and says he hasn't been himself lately.  Marlo Thomas and Ted Bessell appear very briefly in a clip, but I don't have the room to tag them.

Roseanne: Fights & Stuff

Roseanne: Fights & Stuff
ABC
May 21, 1996
Sitcom
DVD
B

This Eric Gilliland story is a sad way to end a tumultuous season, but it is for the most part well-written, and well-acted by Barr and Goodman.  Dan comes home from the hospital and tries to follow a healthier diet, with Roseanne's support, but he's soon cheating.  (Crystal is referred to as having called about seeing him eat junk food in public, but I'm not sure if this is the very last mention of her.)  Roseanne and Dan get into a huge argument, one with long-standing grievances, all established on previous episodes.  (Roseanne's line about Dan having fixed dinner only eleven years ago is a deliberate echo of the pilot episode, "Life & Stuff," where he'd fixed it only three years earlier.)  The tag shows the house that they've trashed.

I do wonder if at this point plans for Season Nine had been formed, or if this devastation, surpassed in TV comedy only by the likes of Blackadder, was how the series itself was supposed to end.  Whether I'd prefer it to the ending of Season Nine is something I can't yet say, but the ninth season would certainly be even more of a roller-coaster ride.

As for the eighth season, it ranges from D to B+ and averages out to a B-, the grade that ten of the episodes earn.  That's perfectly respectable, but this show used to do be more than pretty good.  Whether I'll find Season Nine as bad as its reputation, or as bad as I recall, will be interesting to see.

And this is Roseanne Barr's 200th appearance on one my shows, thanks to Siskel & Ebert and Saturday Night Live.  Her eponymous series would soon catch up, as would some of the cast.

Roseanne: Heart & Soul

Roseanne: Heart & Soul
ABC
May 14, 1996
Sitcom
DVD
B

This Palladino & Walker story has Dan recovering in the hospital, and the family worried but hoping for the best.  Both Dan and Roseanne talk to God, separately, and they think of how they've been together so long.  (Roseanne says since she was 16, but also 25 years, the latter I think counting from her marriage at 18.)  There's also a good scene between Becky and Darlene.  (It was Chalke at the wedding but I'm glad it's Goranson for the more serious stuff.)  Later, the family reminisces, including oddly enough about Dan beating up Fisher.  Again, not a B+, since things feel a little too scripted, not natural, but definitely what would've been a nice penultimate episode for the series as a whole.

Roseanne: The Wedding

Roseanne: The Wedding
ABC
May 7, 1996
Sitcom
DVD
B

In this Kaplan and Broch story (with the same title as the one from five years earlier about Crystal & Ed's wedding), David and Darlene get married, but it's at least as much about their family relationships.  David wishes his parents could be there, but Mark tells him that the Conners are their real parents now (both Mark and David's), because they care for them more than their biological parents ever did.  Darlene has heart-to-heart talks with both Dan and Roseanne, and Goodman's performance is particularly moving, made all the more so by how the episode ends and what Roseanne (Barr and Conner) would do with it later.  The outdoor wedding goes well, despite some snags, but Dan suffers a heart attack during the reception.  Roseanne calls 911, and the fragile "reality" of the series tears further apart.  But we don't know that at this point of course.

Minister Kymberly Newberry was a Dignified Woman on Ellen in '94.  I'm omitting the Hazen Twins and Cole Roberts from the overcrowded tags, but the babies do attend, with Jackie insisting that Andy be ring-bearer.  (One reason this isn't a B+, a little less crazy!Jackie would've helped.)  I'm also omitting Sandra Bernhard, Martin Mull, and Fred Willard as the adults who have the least to do this episode, but it is interesting that of all of Roseanne's friends, it's the gays who attend her daughter's wedding.

Roseanne: Ballroom Blitz

Roseanne: Ballroom Blitz
ABC
April 30, 1996
Sitcom
DVD
B-

Both Bev and Jackie vie for the attentions of dance instructor Hal (seventy-year-old Tony Curtis, as charming as ever, and the tag is a clip from Some Like It Hot).  Meanwhile, the wedding is getting closer, and Roseanne uses her TV gig to get free stuff.  David wants Dan to be his best man, but ends up with Mark.  Cathy Ladman and Carrie Snow, who'd previously appeared together as Cathy and Carrie, co-wrote this episode, Ladman's only, but it's Snow's middle of three Roseanne scripts.

Kathryn Joosten had previously appeared as a Supermarket Customer and is Carol, a woman in the dance class, here.  Seventy-seven-year-old Amzie Strickland, who has movie credits going back to the '30s, and who was on That Girl twice, The Bob Newhart Show twice, and Three's Company once, plays Agnes here and would be on Ellen a couple years later.

Roseanne: Morning Becomes Obnoxious

Roseanne: Morning Becomes Obnoxious
ABC
April 9, 1996
Sitcom
DVD
B-

In this Leif Sandaas story, it's two weeks till David and Darlene's wedding, and Bev is giving him a lot of unwanted advice.  Darlene makes him stand up to her grandmother, but objects when he makes Bev cry.  Meanwhile, Roseanne's outspokenness gets her a gig on a Chicago morning program (with LA newsman Jerry Dunphy playing the host who can't believe he's on such a fluffy show).  This time Bob Fuller is the Makeup Artist.

This is the 1000th time I've given out a B-, my default grade.

Roseanne: Another Mouth to Shut Up

Roseanne: Another Mouth to Shut Up
ABC
March 26, 1996
Sitcom
DVD
B+

This Eric Gilliland story, with a teleplay by Janet Leahy and Rich Kaplan, who would each work on one more episode, shows that the show still had it, when it focused on the core characters and the humor that comes from real life.  (I really doubt the studio audience reactions are sweetened.  They sound genuine this time.)  Darlene has found David a great job in Chicago and they talk about living together, and then she suggests they get married.  He's not sure if she's joking, but she's serious, and pregnant.  Then it's time for the family (minus Mark and Becky) to react, which they do characteristically.

I appreciate that everyone's viewpoint is addressed, including Dan's disappointment that Darlene has done something stupid, when he thought she would be the successful Conner.  Although the word "abortion" isn't used, it's implied as an option, as it was in the episode where Jackie announced her pregnancy, but Darlene, to her own surprise as much as anyone's, is happy about having a baby.  David is stunned and worried, while Roseanne tries to be supportive.  This episode makes me happy that they could still bring it, but also sad that so much potential was pissed away this season in exchange for nonsensical plots and heavy-handed statements.  Note that Darlene thinks the conception happened the night of the fireworks at Disney World.

Roseanne: Springtime for David

Roseanne: Springtime for David
ABC
March 12, 1996
Sitcom
DVD
C+

Garland Testa's first of two Roseanne stories and David Forbes's last of four isn't bad for one of the less realistic episodes, and there are some funny moments in the Disney parody.  (This begins one week after the Disney World trip and then covers two weeks.)  However, I don't think it works entirely on its own terms.  I find it hard to believe that Darlene's mockery wouldn't make David give up on Edelweiss Gardens, but we're never shown or even told what her reaction is.  Also, I'd like to be given a sense that David's mindless conformity is making him unhappy.  To compare this to the ABC sitcoms of roughly twenty years earlier, we got to see Rerun, Horshack, Billy Tate, and Chrissy Snow disillusioned with their cults, but David is so passive that Roseanne deprogramming him just feels like another form of control.  Even Audrey's recent reclamation from Rapture by Ellen had more meaning.

Roseanne: Disney World War II

Roseanne: Disney World War II
ABC
February 27, 1996
Sitcom
DVD
C-

Not terribly much happens in this Allan-Stephan-written plug for ABC's then new owners' Florida theme park.  The characters are all stupid and/or needlessly rude and/or out of character, and that includes the random children who gather and applaud when Bev sings, rather than flee in terror.  But I guess it's nice to see what Disney World looked like in the mid-'90s.  And this would retroactively become the episode where Darlene gets pregnant, if I recall correctly, so there's timeline info at least. 

Ted and Joy Christino again play Tourists.  This time Bob Fuller plays the Bellhop.