Roseanne: The Fifties Show

Roseanne: The Fifties Show
ABC
November 7, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
B-

Allan Stephan, who also wrote the Gilligan's Island tribute episode, did this odd entry.  Well, not odd compared to the previous episode, but still a little weird.  With an intro by a modern-day Roseanne (I think in a Masterpiece Theater satire, but who knows), we see what's supposed to be an episode from roughly 40 years ago, very roughly, considering Dan refers to Joseph McCarthy as if the Senator were a really new figure on the national scene (so '51 maybe?), and yet "the Deej" wants to sing rock & roll.  Some of the points, like about the sexism and racism of the period, are a little heavy-handed, and plot threads ranging from "Rebecca" hoping she'll be pinned by Mark to Jackie's proto-Women's-Lib conspiracy, cleverly disguised as wackiness, are brought up and then forgotten.  A tighter script would've had a clearer focus and kept all the elements juggled.  Still, the parody aspects are well done, from the look to the sound, and of course Goodman is priceless in his role, especially when he pontificates.

David Tyree, who plays Mose Powell (father of Colin), would be Poker Player #6 the next year, while Tony Rich, who is playing an unknown character here, would in '96 be a Party Guest.  Michael Fishman's then three-year-old brother Matthew plays his brother Stinky and does a fine job, catchphrase and all.

Ellen: Trick or Treat - Who Cares?

Ellen: Trick or Treat - Who Cares?
ABC
November 1, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
C

I almost went with a C- for this aptly titled first of seven Ellen stories by Alex Herschlag, but Spence eventually admits he's an asshole (not in those words), and I like Audrey's Halloween costume and how Ellen sits in one of the O's in the Hollywood sign.  Note that, as in the previous night's Roseanne episode, there's a Johnny Cochran reference.  Also, Audrey is described as perky, which would not at all have fit her first season persona.

Anthony Clark and Kate Williamson return as Will Davies and Mrs. Rodgers from Ellen's book club, although the club doesn't actually meet this week.  They're still not funny.

Roseanne: Halloween - The Final Chapter

And this is one of the saner moments.

Roseanne: Halloween - The Final Chapter
ABC
October 31, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
C-

Barr directed and co-wrote, with Lois Bromfield, this odd entry that might well be the Shark Jump, or at least the Putting on the Waterskis moment.  (It'll be easier to tell as the season progresses, or regresses.)  The title I believe has something to do with the fact that this was originally supposed to be the final season of the series, but it doesn't explain why Roseanne, after well over a year of pregnancy, gives birth to a baby boy (Cole Roberts in his first appearance), whom she names after the spirit of Jerry Garcia (Fred Asparagus, who'd played Del Moore on Who's the Boss?), after seeing the recently departed musician in a labor-induced hallucination.  Even before the hospital sequence, we get Ed McMahon and Sarah Chalke, as themselves (I think) mixed in with trick-or-treaters.  And a mini-clip-show of past Halloweens (which is why Gilbert and Goranson are tagged). 

Basically, the whole thing is a mess, not exactly redeemed by the tag where Roseanne fields staged-sounding questions from the audience.  (OK, I did laugh when a man who claims to be one of the writers asks what the hell the episode was.)  You know I've never been a big fan of the Halloween episodes, but they at least had some bearing on reality.  And contrast this episode with some touching and funny moments in the episode with the flashback to D.J.'s birth and you'll see what this series was starting to lose.  It's not all over, but the future doesn't look too bright from this point on out.

Jason Davis's middle Roseanne character is nameless, but he was possibly the lawyer kid.  Bobbie Bates makes her first of two nameless appearances on the show.  (And she was a dancer in Mame over twenty years earlier.)  Trippy Dancer Tera Hendrickson would be Barb on Ellen.

Pride and Prejudice: Episode 1.6

Pride and Prejudice: Episode 1.6
BBC
29 October 1995
Historical Comedy, Romance
DVD
B

The series concludes, feeling a bit rushed rather than a bit slow, but still overall satisfying.  (For instance, I would've liked them to include Lizzy telling her father of all that Mr. Darcy did for Lydia.)  The best scene here is probably the Lizzie vs. Lady Catherine scene, but it's nice to get at least glimpses of nearly everyone.  The overall average is B, worth watching, perhaps worth owning.

Roseanne: The Last Date

Roseanne: The Last Date
ABC
October 24, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
B-

This story by Eric Gilliland and Daniel Palladino (his first of three stories for a series his wife, Amy Sherman, had been writing for for awhile, and after his own memorable stint on Who's the Boss?) has an A story that I have mixed feelings about, a B story that I wanted more about, and a C story that is WTF.  With the baby due in a week, Roseanne wants to get out on the town one last time, which turns into her and Dan crashing a bar mitzvah.  Even though Roseanne Barr was raised Jewish, there are a lot of stereotypes here, yet the point seems to be "Jews are just like us," in that they're rude and loud and warm and food-loving.  Meanwhile, Becky and Darlene bond over a bottle of Schnapps they find, and I wished this subplot didn't just fade out, especially with Becky having doubts about her marriage.  And Jackie is so Flanderized as crazy that she not only ends up playing Monopoly by herself, but she gloats when she beats two of her selves!

Selma Archerd, who, among other things, appeared on The Brady Bunch, has an uncredited role here and played Lucille the year before.  Roseanne writers Cathy Ladman, Bob Nickman (who had played three other characters), Carrie Snow, and Ed Yeager play Guests.

Pride and Prejudice: Episode 1.5

Pride and Prejudice: Episode 1.5
BBC
22 October 1995
Historical Comedy, Romance
DVD
B

This covers only six chapters, but it does things like show some of what Mr. Darcy is going through and have Mr. Collins visit the Bennets rather than just send a letter (with Kitty understandably avoiding him).  This is as good a place as any to address that many people find Steadman annoying as Mrs. Bennet, but I think she (like everyone else) is well cast and Mrs. Bennet is annoying in the same way in the book.  Also, it makes a great contrast with Whitrow's understated Mr. Bennet.   Another thing I should mention is that Jane and Lizzy's friendship is very important in this series, arguably even more than in the book, because Lizzy confides some things in Jane onscreen that she does not in print.

Ellen: Hello, I Must Be Going

Don't go!!!

Ellen: Hello, I Must Be Going
ABC
October 18, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
B+

This first of four Ellen stories by Lisa DeBenedictis and Daryl Rowland broke my heart then and now.  Adam gets a job as a photographer in London and will be gone for three years.  At first, he won't say goodbye to Ellen.  He does bid farewell to Joe and Paige, and, to my squeal of delight and thumbs up, he tells Spence he never liked him (remember, he's known Ellen for a dozen years and probably met her cousin long ago), because he's "rude, arrogant, pushy, and your hairline's receding faster than the beach at Malibu."  Then, at what he thinks is the last minute, Adam hugs Ellen goodbye and says he's in love with her.  It turns out his departure is delayed, three times, and it's very awkward with Ellen.  (Meanwhile, hilariously, Audrey is cheerfully and methodically dating a series of men to get over Adam.)  Ellen, who would have another important emotional exchange at an airport a year and a half later, goes to see him off and they talk out their feelings, while I awww all over the place.  The episode ends with a montage of them waiting together and then she's alone.

Except she's not of course, because she's still got all her friends and Spence, ugh.  Still, a lovely episode if you can ignore what comes later.  (Not a shark-jump though, because this is a series that kept reinventing itself.)

Noelle Hannibal is again an uncredited Customer.  Jamie Kennedy would return as new neighbor Tad, who here has a great random dance to no music, because why not?

Roseanne: Roseanne in the Hood

Roseanne: Roseanne in the Hood
ABC
October 17, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
C+

This episode starts out well, with Roseanne mocking David's "Chia beard" and facing competition from the new restaurant across the street, whose grand opening features "Schneider" (as Harrington is referred to throughout).  But then the teleplay by Mike Costa (his first of two) and Drew Ogier (his first of four), based on a story by Allan Stephan, and Roseanne herself go off the rails.  Not on a Season-Nine level but shark-teasing, as Roseanne and Jackie break into their rival's place and approximately sixteenth-month-pregnant Roseanne gets stuck in the vent above the oven (I guess the "hood" of the title).  Then Stomp shows up and does a dance number in the tag.

Pride and Prejudice: Episode 1.4

Pride and Prejudice: Episode 1.4
BBC
15 October 1995
Historical Comedy, Romance
DVD
B+

I'm bumping this episode up to a B+ because of scenery, and, no, I don't mean Colin Firth in a wet shirt.*  Darbyshire and the Pemberley estate look stunning, and it's believable that Lizzy falls in love with them as much as with the now surprisingly kind and humble Mr. Darcy.  The episode covers nine chapters, starting with Darcy's letter, telling his reasons for breaking up Jane and Bingley and for falling out with Wickham, the latter in part because of Wickham's attempt to elope with Darcy's sister Georgiana (glimpsed in the previous episode and here seen in flashbacks, including when she's supposed to be only eleven; Emilia Fox would get more to do in the next episode, and appear briefly in the conclusion).

Because of the trip to Darbyshire, we see more of the Gardiners (Joanna David and Tim Wylton) than we did in the previous episode, and they would also be in the last two episodes, but less.  Their four children-- played by Jacob Casselden, Julian Erleigh, Marie-Louise Flamank, and Natasha Isaacs-- would return in the next episode.


*When this series originally aired in Britain, it was a major event, must-see telly if you will.  To this day, the wet-shirted Darcy scene is probably the one thing most associated with the mid- to late '90s Austen revival.

Pride and Prejudice: Episode 1.3

Pride and Prejudice: Episode 1.3
BBC
8 October 1995
Historical Comedy, Romance
DVD
B

In this episode, covering fourteen chapters, Jane goes to London and Lizzy goes to Kent, where she re-encounters Mr. Darcy and meets his more amiable cousin Col. Fitzwilliam (Anthony Calf), as well as their not all at amiable aunt and cousin, the de Bourghs.  Jane discovers that Caroline Bingley's friendship for her has faded away, and it appears that Mr. Bingley no longer cares for her. As for Elizabeth, Mr. Collins and the de Bourghs are as she expected, but Mr. Darcy's behaviour is peculiar, leading to a surprising and insulting proposal.  After two and a half episodes set around the Bennets' home of Longbourn, it's nice to get some variety of scenery and characters.

This is the 2500th show I've reviewed.  I doubt we'll make it to 3000, but we'll definitely hit 2600.

Ellen: The Bridges of L.A. County

Ellen: The Bridges of L.A. County
ABC
October 4, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
C+

I almost went with a C or C-, because I didn't at all care about the Newman & Stark plot of Spence having a one-night stand with dumb blonde Karen Lewis (Christine Taylor, who gives more to the part than it deserves, but then earlier in the year she was such a good big-screen Marcia Brady that Maureen McCormick was impressed).  However, the scene of Ellen, Paige, and Audrey getting drunk on wine, playing with hair extensions, and complaining about men was genuinely funny.  I pouted when Adam's scene with Joe was over.  I'm really not looking forward to more of aggressive, opinionated Spence and I don't know why the producers thought he was an improvement over flawed but sweet Adam.

Although I didn't find the book group particularly funny, Paul Bates, Anthony Clark, Brian George, Bob Glouberman, and Kate Williamson would return as respectively Kenny Burke, Will Davies, Ranjit Sudar, the Book Club Pundit, and Mrs. Rodgers later in the year.

Pride and Prejudice: Episode 1.2

Pride and Prejudice: Episode 1.2
BBC
1 October 1995
Historical Comedy, Romance
DVD
B

This episode (which covers eight chapters) introduces Lynn Farleigh as Mrs. Bennet's sister Mrs. Phillips (three more episodes after this one), David Bamber as Mr. Collins (in every episode from now on, although not always as much as in this one), Adrian Lukis as George Wickham (also continuing through the rest of the series), and very briefly (without lines and only in a flashback) Barbara Leigh-Hunt as Lady Catherine de Bourgh (three more much more prominent appearances), Nadia Chambers as Miss Anne de Bourgh (three more episodes), and Harriet Eastcott as Mrs. Jenkinson (one more appearance).  While the other characters all have something to do (for instance, it's fun to watch Mary's reactions, since she has a whole little backstory that you can pick up on that way), this episode is primarily about Lizzy's interactions with the two men she meets, and how they affect her impressions of Mr. Darcy.  (If we hadn't got Firth's point of view in the first episode, we'd wonder why he looks pissed off all the time.)  Mr. Collins's courtship of Lizzy is played for laughs even more than in the book, while Wickham's charming her is at this point shown without subtext, although the astute viewer/reader will wonder why he's telling his life story to a new acquaintance.

Whose Line Is It Anyway?: Episode 7.10

Whose Line Is It Anyway?: Episode 7.10
Channel Four
29 September 1995
Improv Game Show
VHS
C+

This very obviously is not only the same line-up as on 7.8, with the contestants wearing the same outfits, but even Clive's introductions are exactly the same!  The best thing about the episode is Ryan's struggle through accents in FATS with Josie.  As for shipping, not only do they do "German Porn" there, but their credits-reading has them about to make out until they're caught on a security camera.

Ellen: The Shower Scene

Ellen: The Shower Scene
ABC
September 27, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
B

Dava Savel's first of eight Ellen stories is a funny if sometimes implausible one.  (As Ellen and Spence acknowledge in their exchange about whether a scheme is something Lucy Ricardo would do.)  Paige has to throw a shower for her "perfect" sister Heather (Connie Britton, well-cast, in her first of three appearances that season), who's recently had twins.  She brings over Heather's birth videocassette, which Ellen accidentally tapes over with a thirtysomething episode.  Note that poor Adam is hardly in this episode, just a line or two, with not only Paige and Spence given lots to do, but Joe and Audrey featured more than Adam.

Nurse Judy Kain was Janet's friend Joan Ferguson on Three's Company and had a nameless role on Roseanne in '90.  Noelle Hannibal is once again an uncredited Customer.

Roseanne: Let Them Eat Junk

Roseanne: Let Them Eat Junk
ABC
September 26, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
B-

In this Berry & Yeager teleplay, based on a story by Carrie Snow (her first of three for the series), Jackie is such an overprotective mother that she insults Roseanne's kids.  I was going to go with a C+, but I like the twist at the end that Jackie may be right (if over the top about expressing it), when we learn that Bev comforted Roseanne with food.  Meanwhile, Dan tries to change D.J.'s image of him but blunders until they discuss classic cartoons.  I'm omitting Martin Mull but adding the Hazen twins (despite their omission on IMDB) because Andy does some cute scenes.

Pride and Prejudice: Episode 1.1

Pride and Prejudice: Episode 1.1
BBC
24 September 1995
Historical Comedy, Romance
DVD
B

Other than the leads (mentioned in the synopsis below), the regulars:

• Roger Barclay would be in three more episodes as Capt. Carter;
• So would David Bark-Jones as Lt. Denny;
• Christopher Benjamin would be Sir William Lucas thrice more;
• Anna Chancellor would be Miss Bingley in every episode;
• Judy Chetner appears in two more episodes as an uncredited Lady at Dance;
• David Coastworth appears in all six episodes as the uncredited Gun Keeper;
• Lucy Davis is in almost all the other episodes as Maria Lucas;
• Victoria Hamilton and Paul Moriarty would be in two more episodes as Mrs. and Col. Forster;
• Roy Holder would be Hodge the gardener twice more;
• Kate O'Malley appears in two more episodes as Sarah the maid, but Annabel Taylor would be Maggie the maid only once more.
• Neville Phillips, who was a Member on Jeeves and Wooster, would return once more as Fossett the footman;
• Lucy Robinson would be in all the other episodes as Mrs. Hurst;
• Lucy Scott (yes, there are a lot of Lucys here) would be in nearly every episode as Charlotte Lucas;
• Marlene Sidaway, who was a Pub Landlady on J & W, would make three more appearances as Hill the Housekeeper;
• Christopher Staines would be Lt. Sanderson once more;
• Norma Streader as Lady Lucas would be in two more episodes;
• Annabel Taylor would return as Maggie the maid;
• and Rupert Vansittart would be Mr. Hurst thrice more.

This is a reasonably faithful, if sometimes slow-moving, adaptation of the first dozen chapters of the classic novel, which I reviewed here: http://rereadingeverybookiown.blogspot.com/2011/12/pride-and-prejudice.html.  A mismatched couple (Whitrow and Steadman) have five marriageable daughters (Susannah Harker as Jane, Jennifer Ehle as Lizzy, Lucy Briers as Mary, Molly Maberly as Kitty, and Julia Sawalha as Lydia), so when young, handsome, rich, and eligible bachelors Mr. Bingley (Crispin Bonham-Carter) and Mr. Darcy (Colin Firth in the role that defined him) arrive in the neighbourhood, they must be "in want of wives."  The basic set-up and characters are established in this episode, although the setting and circumstances will change as the story progresses, and a couple very memorable characters (Mr. Collins and Lady Catherine) have yet to be introduced.  Overall, the casting, costumes, music, acting, etc. are solid and I can't think of anything terribly wrong, just that the magic of the novel is hard to capture in full.

Simon Langton, who directed the '91 J & W episodes, directed every episode of this series.

Whose Line Is It Anyway?: Episode 7.9

Whose Line Is It Anyway?: Episode 7.9
Channel Four
22 September 1995
Improv Game Show
VHS
C+

The best game here, not necessarily the funniest but the one showing the most talent, is Josie and Caroline's love duet about a beached whale.  The two old friends are affectionate there and in their FATS.  (Quentin will still married to Paul Merton at this point by the way, but Paul was long gone from WLIIA and so they'd never work together on this programme.)

Ellen: These Successful Friends of Mine

Ellen: These Successful Friends of Mine
ABC
September 20, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
B-

Tom Leopold's first of three Ellen stories (this one obviously playing on the series' original title) takes awhile to get going, but the scene of Ellen in the oddity museum somewhere on the road to Barstow is priceless.  (One of my best friends and I adopted "Fifty million years ago, dinosaurs ruled the earth.  In 1973, I opened this museum" as a catchphrase.)  Watching now, I wanted more of that quirky kind of humor and less of Paige and Spence bickering in order to establish their sexual tension.

Rick Hall, who had an unknown role on Roseanne in 1990, makes his first of two appearances as Contractor #1 (the other not till '97), while Mousy Man David Wells was a Protester on Roseanne.

Roseanne: Shower the People You Love with Stuff

I love Sara Gilbert even more for rockin' a Felix the Cat T-shirt!

Roseanne: Shower the People You Love with Stuff
ABC
September 19, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
B

In this Lawrence Broch Season Eight Opener, Roseanne is still pregnant with her third daughter, but it's her older two girls who are acting like babies, although now 21 and 19.  Goranson returns and proves that she's Becky #1 in quality as well as chronology.  She and Gilbert pick up where they left off (Darlene even making fun of Becky's butt) and others react to their bickering.  Neither girl wants to throw a baby shower for their greedy mother, and meanwhile poor David throws a shower for the unappreciative men.  Note that Goodman has a full beard which no one remarks on, but there are lots of jokes about Becky being gone a long time.  (Sadly, the DVD doesn't include the Patty Duke Show parody, which you can find on Youtube, William Schallert cameo and all.)

John McConnell returns as Bob.  I'm omitting Adilah Barnes, Sandra Bernhard, and Natalie West from the overcrowded tags, but Anne-Marie and Nancy would return while Crystal would not.

Whose Line Is It Anyway?: Episode 7.8

Whose Line Is It Anyway?: Episode 7.8
Channel Four
15 September 1995
Improv Game Show
VHS
C+

I don't think, at this point anyway, that adding props to World's Worst particularly helps.  And having Stephen Frost host Party Quirks may not be the best idea, when he's such a quick guesser.  (I mean, if Josie Finds Bald Heads Irresistible, shouldn't we see her flirt with Colin, too?)  Still, it's not a bad line-up and apparently had enough material to fill another episode (7.10).  Psychiatrist is probably the best of the lot here, if only to hear Richard and the contestants try to do Austrian and Greek music, and I like New Job Old Job, with Ryan & Josie checking into a hotel as a very unmarried couple and Stephen as a bellhop who used to work in airport security.  Note that I'm missing Episode 7.7, as far as I know, but my guess is that it (and 7.4) would've earned C+s, too.

Ellen: Shake, Rattle and Rubble

Ellen: Shake, Rattle and Rubble
ABC
September 13, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
C+

I'd forgotten that Ellen's cousin Spence (Jeremy Piven) shows up so early in the series' run, in fact overlapping with Adam.  I don't think it's just my preference for Adam over Spence that makes this Heisler & Heline Season Three Opener not quite work.  It tries to do too much-- including two earthquakes!-- and a lot of the jokes just don't hit.  The opening is deliberately awkward, with Ellen apologizing for the new credits sequence not being ready, and if I recall correctly this would turn into a running joke, possibly all the way into Season Four.  (Details are fuzzy, and for various reasons I was watching even less TV than I had in the '94-'95 season.)

Note that Paige is attracted to Spence (in the dark) when she hears he's a doctor, but it turns out he's been kicked out of his practice.  And Adam/Audrey are still going strong.  No word on Ellen's love life, and I believe this was the season where they stopped trying to pretend Ellen Morgan was straight but they weren't yet ready to have her come out.  As for Ellen's career, she will have to rebuild the bookstore after the quakes.

Noelle Hannibal is yet again an Uncredited Customer.  The Customer with lines is played by Ruth Manning, who has a ton of TV credits, including Nurse Engel and Harriet Hadley on Three's Company.  Reporter Rick Fitts had played villain Martin Jackson on Generations, but not on any episodes I have on tape; he would be a Doctor on Roseanne in '97.  This is the first of twenty-five Ellen episodes (I'm guessing all of Season Three) directed by Robby Benson, yes, that Robby Benson.

Whose Line Is It Anyway?: Episode 7.6

Whose Line Is It Anyway?: Episode 7.6
Channel Four
1 September 1995
Improv Game Show
VHS
C+

The undoubted highlight here is the Party Quirks, where Colin is all Seven Dwarves and Ryan is Animals Crossing a Road; even though I'm not big on physical humor, I could see why Mike (In Love with Cameras) keeps cracking up, and of course Tony is baffled most of the time.  Runner-up is Bar Scene, especially Tony referencing Mrs. Slocum's love for her "pussy" on Are You Being Served?

Whose Line Is It Anyway?: Episode 7.5

Charlie's Angels

Whose Line Is It Anyway?: Episode 7.5
Channel Four
25 August 1995
Improv Game Show
VHS
C+

Unless it turns up on an unexpected tape, it looks like I'm missing Episode 7.4.  Other than the Clive & Greg teasing, my favorite part here is the premiere of Let's Make a Date, a variation on Party Quirks.  It's not hilarious and, as Clive notes, Greg fails to guess everyone (or to actually pick a bachelor), but it's interesting to see how it plays out.  Note that Richard Vranch appears at the end but the Comedy Central version my ex taped doesn't actually include any musical games.  Unless I've counted wrong, this is my 100th show from Channel Four.

Whose Line Is It Anyway?: Episode 7.3 [fragment]

Whose Line Is It Anyway?: Episode 7.3 [fragment]
Channel Four
11 August 1995
Improv Game Show
VHS
C+

Yes, this line-up again, but it's not bad.  My favorite game is Press Conference, which is similar to Party Quirks, except Tony has to guess why he's holding a presser, in this case because he's the First Man to Make Love in Outer Space.  (I'm not sure what I'm missing of the Comedy Central edit beyond the opening credits and introductions.)

Parliament: Give Up the Funk (Tear the Roof off the Sucker)

Parliament: Give Up the Funk (Tear the Roof off the Sucker)

VH1

Song released April 1976

Music Video

VHS

B

Although the kaleidoscope of stills, concert footage, and that '90s chalky title cards thing doesn't work per se, you can't sink this unsinkable classic, and the costumes did make me say, "Wow!"

Wild Cherry: Play That Funky Music

Wild Cherry: Play That Funky Music
VH1
Song released April 1976
Music Video
VHS
B-

The catchy, funky song not shot in a particularly interesting way.

Whose Line Is It Anyway?: Episode 7.2

Whose Line Is It Anyway?: Episode 7.2
Channel Four
4 August 1995
Improv Game Show
VHS
C+

Other than the Clive & Greg bickering of course, my favorite thing here is probably Greg & Mike's sci-fi/horror Scene to Music.

Whose Line Is It Anyway?: Episode 7.1

Whose Line Is It Anyway?: Episode 7.1
Channel Four
28 July 1995
Improv Game Show
VHS
C+

One-timer Niall Ashdown isn't bad on this series-opener, although some of the laughs come from Greg's reactions to Niall's Geordie (Newcastle) accent.  Questions Only might be the best game of the episode, but then it's generally better than most of the other games.

Roseanne: Sherwood Schwartz-- A Loving Tribute

Roseanne: Sherwood Schwartz-- A Loving Tribute
ABC
May 24, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
B-

Allan Stephan's first of seven Roseanne scripts and William Lucas Walker's middle of five is an odd one, for a few reasons.  It starts out well, with David graduating from college and deciding to go to Europe with money his mom sent him.  OK, it does seem weird that she'd do that, but whatever.  Darlene doesn't want David to leave, since they just got back together.  Dan and David have a good talk.  Then Roseanne wants Dan to not work on his boat, for what is the first time in about six years.  This somehow segues into the "tribute" to Gilligan's Island.  (Yes, on the same night that CBS was saluting The Brady Bunch.)  The cast (minus Becky) appear as the GI characters, except David is still David.  Roseanne realizes that she's been asking Dan to give up his dream and encourages David to follow his dream to go to Europe.  Then in the tag, the surviving four GI cast members act together for what I'm guessing is the first time in twenty-eight years, with Louise as Roseanne (ironically the 100th show of hers I've reviewed), Johnson as Mark, Wells as Darlene, and best of all Denver as Jackie (wearing, as you can see in the photo below, one of Jackie's regular sweaters).  Schwartz himself appears as a new staff writer.  Some of the gags are cheap, but I did laugh out loud a few times.  It's just an odd blend, mixing the slapstick and the realism, as if to say that the days of Roseanne smoothly changing tones are long over.

Dave Mallow, who was a voice actor on the American version of The Noozles, is the Radio Announcer here.  For I believe the third time, I have to omit Michael Fishman from the credits, but I'll note that he plays a cannibal.  I'm also omitting Glenn Quinn, Martin Mull, and Estelle Parsons, who appear as the Professor and the Howells but not as their regular characters.

Roseanne in its seventh season ranges from C to B, averaging out to a high B-, so saying it's in decline isn't that harsh, yet.  It's still a fine show at times, but the Flanderization and sometimes laziness of the writing (and to some degree Mancuso's direction) don't bode well for Season Eight....

Brady Bunch Home Movies

Brady Bunch Home Movies

CBS
May 24, 1995
Documentary
DVD
B-

Pardon the pun, but this is a little unfocused.  Is it, like Bradymania two years earlier, a look at the "phenomenon" of BBunch?  Is it a look at what the cast did before and after the series?  Is it a behind-the-scenes presentation, including of the "home" movies the kids shot after Robert Reed bought them hand-held cameras?  A little of all of that I guess, sometimes paired with odd background music, e.g. "Tequila."  I do like the tribute to Reed and that they got six of the surviving eight onstage together.  (Maureen and Eve's segments were shot separately, but it is interesting to see that they were actually much better friends than you would now think.)  Note that a couple clips from Day by Day appear, as do clips from the various spin-offs.  I'm not tagging all the other folks who appear, including co-producer of this special Lloyd Schwartz and Bob Cummings in a clip from his '50s show, but yeah, again Jerry Houser has to be omitted.

Ellen: Thirty Kilo Man, Part 2

Note that Dan and Ellen have exactly the same taste in clothes.

Ellen: Thirty Kilo Man, Part 2
ABC
May 17, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
B

In this lesser but still fun second part, this time written by Maria Semple, Ellen finds out that Dan (William Ragsdale) is actually importing pizza supplies.  Her parents have a great little scene where they not only ship "Danellen" (Paige's term) as hard as I do, but they deal with "the Man," i.e. police, who turns out to be Jack (Patrick Warburton again).  Dan forgives Ellen for being suspicious and they enter three weeks of NRE (new relationship energy, although that term isn't used).  Paige resents Ellen blowing her off to be with Dan.  Meanwhile, Dan helps Adam see how attractive Audrey is and soon A/A is hotter than ever.  How this all works out, including the role Joe plays in it, is interesting to see. The final moments, where Ellen says she's going to be in a movie (1996's Mr. Wrong I assume) and Paige says she's going to be a Broadway star, is fourth-wall-breaking.  Ellen says Dan will be back in a week, but in fact two very significant years would pass before his return.

Noelle Hannibal is again an uncredited Customer, and Dean Fortunato is again a Nameless Man.

Ellen in Season Two ranges from C to B+, almost half of those as B-s, so it's not surprising that the average is B- like Season One, although a high B- this time.  This cast seems better defined than "These Friends of Mine," and when the show works, it works well.  This was at a time when I was watching less TV (I'd gone back to college after the divorce), but I still caught my Wednesday night funny ladies when I could.  I don't know if at the time I realized that Ellen was finding itself and Roseanne was slowly losing itself, but it seems obvious now.  I don't remember much about Season Three of Ellen specifically, except that I think the core cast was kept intact, for now....

Roseanne: Couch Potatoes

Roseanne: Couch Potatoes
ABC
May 17, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
C+

This Eric Gilliland story is odd, especially when the tag seems to offer a lesson that the rest of the episode, and indeed future episodes, ignore.  Roseanne is two months away from giving birth and has entered a "nesting phase," which means she wants to upgrade furniture and the family's viewing habits, especially after they become a Nielsen family.  The Flanderization of not just Mark but most of the family as unfunny idiots is creeping in here, until that final scene, where Dan and Roseanne have a conversation much like they used to, realistic and sweet and funny.

Roseanne watches a Beverly Hillbillies marathon (and, no, Buddy Ebsen would not have been 105; he would've been 87) and realizes that they will always be "white trash" and they shouldn't try to pretend to be anything else.  When she and Dan talk about what the Clampetts do with their money, it casts an odd light on Season Nine, since the Conners, Roseanne especially, will not exactly stay down-to-earth.  The thing is, if Gilliland were really taking the "to thine own self be true" message to heart, he wouldn't have waited till this last scene to make characters be in character, unless the irony is intentional. Meanwhile, Fred and Jackie, after a mostly silent dinner, agree that it's really over between them.

Ellen: Thirty Kilo Man, Part 1

Previously on Ellen

Ellen: Thirty Kilo Man, Part 1
ABC
May 10, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
B+

It's a shame Vicki S. Horwitz didn't work on any other of my shows, because her script is easily the best of the season (unless Part 2 tops it of course).  Dan (William Ragsdale) returns from Italy after six months and he's no longer delivering pizzas but is instead in the international import/export business.  They start seeing each other again and fall in love, but then she starts to suspect he's a drug smuggler.  Before that suspicion, Ellen is deliriously happy, and her female friends are happy for her that she's, one, in love, and two, had sex.  (Adam starts to regret moving out, as if feeling threatened that Dan may move in, and Joe is seldom happy anyway.)  Meanwhile, Audrey's cop boyfriend is jealous of Adam, which is of course Audrey's fault.

The episode is playful, from opening to closing credits (President Clinton gives Ellen a fancy VCR in the flashbacks, and both the main plot and the subplots are "to be continued"), sweet, romantic, and very funny.  Obviously, Ellen, even more than Roseanne's Jackie, can't be happy with a man for long (and not just because this character will eventually come out), since this is a show about singles.  But it is charming to see Ellen so giddy, and I was and am a hardcore Ellen/Dan shipper.  I don't remember what happens in Part 2, so it'll be interesting to see how this is resolved.

Patrick Warburton, who was Brent earlier in the year, is Jack here and in Part 2.  Noelle Hannibal makes another of her uncredited appearances as a Customer, while Dean Fortunato would again be a nameless Man on Part 2.  And Jerry Penacoli plays Paige's date Richard in a flashback (a man she's already forgotten, although Dan asks about him).  Note that Paige claims to have dated approximately 100 men.

Roseanne: The Birds and the Frozen Bees

Roseanne: The Birds and the Frozen Bees
ABC
May 10, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
B

David Forbes wrote this story where the frozen bees only appear in the opening scene.  Mostly, it's about Roseanne encouraging Darlene to get back with David, especially after Darlene admits that none of the many guys she's dated at school (apparently since the break-up with Jimmy) can compare to David.  In the end, Darlene finds the courage to share her feelings with David, and to apologize for how she treated him, and he takes her back without question.  We also find out that at some point she went on and off the Pill, unless she's joking.  Note that Jackie plays Marcia Clark in the tag, and Ellen wasn't the only ABC sitcom of that season to refer to the O.J. murder trial.

Ellen: The Therapy Episode

Ellen: The Therapy Episode
ABC
May 3, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
C+

I'm not sure what to make of this Driscoll & Hester story where nearly dying on a ski-lift causes Ellen to try honesty with her parents, Paige to thrill-seek, and Adam to try to distribute his sperm before he dies.  Paxton Whitehead returns as Dr. Whitcomb, but this is far from the only "therapy episode."

Roseanne: The Blaming of the Shrew

Roseanne: The Blaming of the Shrew
ABC
May 3, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
B-

Around the time that Ellen Morgan was starting therapy, Ellen DeGeneres appeared as a marriage counselor for Fred and Jackie, and, yes, she babbled.  In Lawrence Broch's story, Fred and Jackie really face the fact that they didn't know each other before they got married and they're two very different people.  They still haven't broken up yet, but the groundwork is definitely laid.  Meanwhile, D.J. has a bossy girlfriend, who makes him go to Chicago by bus (unlike when David and Darlene were happy to go together).  His reason for dating her turns out to be that she French-kisses, as he confides in David.

Ellen: Three Strikes

Rockin' out to "Born to Be Wild"

Ellen: Three Strikes
ABC
March 29, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
B-

This story by two writers who didn't work on any other of my shows feels uneven, although it is nice to see more of Ellen's parents, as she's released to their custody after an animal-rights protest.  And we find out that Joe's father was a hunter, and Joe's mother made Joe wear a dress.  (When Ellen wears one, everyone reacts like she's in drag, which in a way she is.)

Clyde Kusatsu, who's Judge Mitchell Sung, played three different roles on M*A*S*H and was Kim Lee on Who's the Boss?  Cop Roger Eschbacher would later appear as Derek.

Roseanne: Happy Trailers

Roseanne: Happy Trailers
ABC
March 29, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
B-

This Doyle & Youngers story for the most part isn't great (the over-the-top performance of Sharon Stone as trailer trash doesn't help), but I really like the talk Roseanne and Darlene have towards the end.  Mark and Becky move into a trailer park and her parents want to help, but the young couple wants to be independent, especially with Roseanne and Dan's baby on the way.  Note that Dan makes a joke about them not buying lottery tickets anymore, which would become ironic in retrospect.  Also, David and Darlene seem to be on better terms at this point than recently.

John McConnell returns as Bob.

Ellen: $5,000

Ellen: $5,000
ABC
March 22, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
B

Newman & Stark wrote this very funny episode where an IRS agent (Dann Florek, great here, at a point when he'd been on Roseanne the first of three times, as Darlene's Principal, before coming back as a doctor) encourages Ellen to spend her refund of the title amount, but she gives it to Helping Hand, only to find out that the IRS made a mistake.  Meanwhile, Joe is an illegal immigrant from Canada, and Adam is taking pictures of Paige as inanimate objects.

Roseanne: Husbands and Wives

Roseanne: Husbands and Wives
ABC
March 22, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
B

It feels like a lot of this season is about getting a little derailed and then getting back on track, as in this Kevin Abbott story which finally deals with the aftermath of Fred walking out on Jackie.  Roseanne and Dan try to get them back together, but both Fred and Jackie are reluctant.  Fred realizes he overreacted when he has to defend Jackie to her mother, but Jackie realizes she prefers being on her own.  They reconcile, for the moment.  Meanwhile, Darlene and D.J. fight like in the old days.

Ellen: Gladiators

Ellen: Gladiators
ABC
March 1, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
C

Not only didn't I care about Ellen's triangle with Nitro and Ice (Dan Clark and Lori Fetrick, who had both appeared on Who's the Boss? six years earlier), but I didn't care about Richard Day's subplots of Joe trying to be polite to customers, and Paige and Audrey getting in a car accident.  Note that Audrey gives Adam a big kiss, although she's supposed to be over him.  Customer #2, Raymond Forchion, would be Smitty the following year.  This is the first of two Ellen episodes directed by Trainor.

Roseanne: All About Rosey

Roseanne: All About Rosey
ABC
March 1, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
C+

Ulin & Sandaas wrote the frame for this hour-long clip show, which I might've given a B- if they could've kept the same frame throughout.  Things start out well in 1965, when Roseanne (played screechingly by Fishman) and Jackie (Metcalf's approximately eleven-year-old daughter Zoe Perry, quite good as approximately nine-year-old Jackie, her second time in the role after being in the '92 Halloween episode) visit a female fortune-teller, played by Goodman.  For $1, he can show them Roseanne's life from '88 to '94.  And then we get opening credits that splice together the various credit sequences, a bit like the morphing credits in Season Eight or Nine.  Certainly, the episode is propelled by nostalgia, although as always when a clip show runs late in a series, especially a series in decline like this one, there's going to be regret that things aren't as good as they used to be.  (Even the Darlene-teasing-D.J.-about-masturbation-at-the-dinner-table sequence from Season Six already looks classic compared to Season Seven.)

In the next frame, set in 2025, a Bev-looking Jackie takes D.J. to a Psychiatrist played by Eric Christmas (many, many credits, including both Harold and Maude and Attack of the Killer Tomatoes).  Goodman plays middle-aged D.J., who's traumatized by the Becky switch.  And then in the final frame, covering about half the episode, Roseanne is visited by other TV Moms:

• Barbara Billingsley as June Cleaver;
• Pat Crowley as perhaps the most obscure TV mom, Joan Nash from Please Don't Eat the Daisies;
• June Lockhart as Lassie's Ruth Martin (not looking much different than she did on It's Garry Shandling's Show eight years earlier);
• Alley Mills as Norma Arnold from The Wonder Years;
• and Isabel Sanford (who hasn't been heard on one of my shows since Wait Till Your Father Gets Home) as Louise Jefferson.

You can see from that odd assortment that, with the exception of Billingsley and Lockhart, these aren't the classic TV Moms that would've been thought of even in the '90s.  Yes, Sanford is a TV icon, but we remember her marriage to George much more than her motherhood of Lionel.  (And even Lockhart is associated more with the dog than her son.)  It gives the episode a feeling of being thrown together, and the contrasts of old-fashioned TV with Roseanne feel a little forced.  I'd much rather have had them stick with the first frame throughout.

Bob Telford appears as Bill in archival footage.

Ellen: The Sleep Clinic

An unsteady triangle

Ellen: The Sleep Clinic
ABC
February 22, 1995
Sitcom
DVD
B

This might be the best episode of the season, although not quite a B+.  It's very funny, insightful, and even at times sexy (though a sexiness played for laughs).  In this Mark Driscoll story, both Ellen and Audrey are having erotic dreams about Adam, but Audrey has a crush on Adam and ends up seducing him, while Ellen ends up seeing a therapist, Dr. Whitcomb (Paxton Whitehead in his first of three appearances in the role).  Adam has Ellen pretend to be his girlfriend, after he regrets giving in to Audrey, and of course Ellen's visiting mother is thrilled that Ellen has finally found a man.  (Mrs. Morgan seems to like Adam a lot more than she likes Paige.)  Ellen and Adam do end up kissing (for the first time in twelve years), a light kiss to make Audrey happy and then a deeper kiss after Audrey leaves.  And yet, Adam and Ellen feel no sparks.  So I guess it's not a sailable ship.  But, yeah, it's fun watching Arye Gross get to make out so much.